Obooma says on gas prices, nothing can be done,
It’s trouble in the Middle East, it’s the position of the sun.
Maybe global warning, but that would be strange,
That’s a tough thing to accept, so we’ll call it climate change.
Gas prices just keep climbing, the situation seems quite grim,
But the environmentalists and Obooma, treat it like a hymn.
Obooma says on gas prices, nothing can be done,
What was the Keystone pipeline, just politics to be spun?
Obooma blames the Republicans for not giving him time,
Like waiting till after November, so he can hide his crime.
What about the Arctic Refuge, with a zilllion barrels of oil?
Can’t our American know-how keep the Refuge free from spoil?
Obooma says on gas prices, he’s working really hard,
When votes are at risk, he becomes quite the bard.
With sky-rocketing prices and fewer cars on the road,
It reduces our carbon footprint and helps the endangered toad.
(This will help the toad get across the road).
Obooma said three years into his term, things would be OK,
Well it’s time for him to pack it up and move without delay.
He’s truly Nero fiddling, while our country goes to hell,
But his voice is quite appealing and he bows exceedingly well.
Parties at the White House give him chances to get down,
But for the good of our nation, we need to get rid of this clown.
Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com
Monthly Archives: February 2012
Fun Ball – MIZZOU B-Ball
What a fun season. Fun, fun, fun. Watching the Missouri Tigers play basketball is really fun. The word “fun” when used with competitive sports usually sets me off. When I hear a coach say, “I just want my boys to go out and have fun.” I say, “Oh yeh?” Fun is a code word for winning.
Think this through. Is it fun to lose? Is it fun to win? Be honest now. Well, there was the one coed volleyball game we lost in junior high. Nah, it sucked. If it is truly a competitive sport, how can anyone have fun while they are losing? I’ll just mention in passing that during the three years I was in high school, we never lost a football game. Old East Side High. Fun.
So if MIZZOU is fun to watch, they must be winning. But it is so much more. It is all the things they do in the process of winning. First, in the era where seven footers are bumping into each other on the court, MIZZOU’s starting line up is short. They play a four guard offense. The four guards range from 6′ 6″ to 5′ 10″. Ricardo Ratliffe is the only decent size player on the floor. He is 6′ 8″ and is leading the entire nation in field goal percentage. Sure, a lot of his baskets are from around the bucket, but all these seven footers are also scoring under the bucket. As soon as his hands touch the ball, it is in the basket. No bouncing the ball, no faking one way and then the other, just fast as a magic trick. Ratliffe was a two-year JUCO first team All American before he moved to Columbia.
Next, in an era when college basketball teams are permitted to have 13 players on scholorship, MIZZOU has seven. Laurence Bowers would have been number eight, but he tore his ACL before the season started. Well, I guess he is still #8, he just can’t play. So in the course of the battle only two subs come off of the bench. Coach Frank Haith, in his first year at MIZZOU, has done a great job of shuffling players so as to keep them fresh.
So they are small and there aren’t many of them, and right now, they are 23 and 2 and ranked 3rd in the nation! Talk about fun! On the one hand, they would have made great boy scouts because they are constantly helping others. Exceedingly unselfish. Then, on the other hand, they are a group of artful dodgers pilfering the ball with great skill AND turning in fast break points.
Michael Dixon started last year and has been relegated to “sixth man” this year. He could have bitched and moaned, but he has just accepted the roll and has played a key part in some of MIZZOU’s victories. He has Bobby Knight’s vote for the NCAA’s sixth man. I didn’t know there was such a thing. I wonder if there is a 7th man or an 8th man. Did I mention the Dixon and Marcus Denman shoot over 90% from the free throw line? Couple all that with the fact that we have five players who can hit a clutch 3-pointer (they average 8 per game and make close to 4 out of every 10) and you are beginning to see how much fun it can be to watch them.
Flip Pressey, our point guard, is leading the Big 12 in steals and second in assists. They are just an unselfish bunch. Kim English opted for the NBA draft two years ago and wasn’t picked up. Last year, he was nothing special, but this year the senior has won games with every aspect of his skills.
What lies ahead? Well, teams lose and I expect MIZZOU will get upset somewhere down the line. That won’t be fun. They have to play Kansas in Kansas in a couple of weeks. Then there’s the Big 12 Championship and the NCAA finals. Regardless of what happens, it’s been fun. MIZ-
Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com
The Cursed Costa Concordia Captain
There is something almost mystical about sea captains. In the early days, they took their ships to places never seen before. What courage it took to take a ship over the horizon and into the unknown. Well, sea captains may no longer be as mystical. Perhaps it’s because the unknown has shrunken so. They are still quite special and usually held in high esteem.
Then there’s the Costa Concordia captain, Francesco Schettino. The only thing mystical about Captain Schettino is how he mystically ended up in a life boat while his 4200 passengers were still fighting for their lives on board the ship (some, of course, lost their lives). Should we give him the benefit of the doubt? I think not. He says he was helping others into the life boat when the ship lurched and he fell in. I guess he could have climbed back out. But, as luck would have it, it was the same life boat that his Moldavian girlfriend had climbed into. But most telling was when the port authority ordered him to return to his ship, Schettino mentioned that it was dark and cold out (and he didn’t have his blankie).
Italy can’t win for losing. They have an image problem. Listed under The World’s Shortest Books and right before “The Amish Telephone Book” is “Famous Italian War Heros”. Then along comes the activities of the cowardly Captain Schettino.
I guess by now most people know that the captain directed the ship off course so he could do a nautical “fly by” for a friend who lived close by. He planned to blast the horn in a form of a salute. The ship never got to the horn part. But his friend, a retired Costa admiral, will be able to look out toward the island of Giglio, perhaps for the next year, and see a reminder of the abortive salute. “All this for me?”
Follow this, the ship hit the reef at 9:45 PM on January 13 (Friday the 13th). Twenty minutes later (10:05 PM), the captain was contacted by the company and he told them he had a problem. At 10:25 PM, forty minutes after the gash was cut into the ship, the crew was instructing people that there was an electrical problem and they should go to their cabins. It wasn’t until 11:00 PM that the captain directed the abandoning of the ship. And he really meant it, because that is exactly what he did.
One of my friends who knew that we liked to cruise inquired whether the Costa debacle would cause us to change our plans. Absolutely not. I can’t think of a safer time to cruise. The recent experience will cause every ship captain to be a better Boy Scout, paying close attention to that which is important. They will save their stow away Moldavian women for deeper, calmer waters.
I have been told that Winston Churchill once was overheard saying how he preferred to cruise on Italian ships. He allegedly said, “First the cuisine is unsurpassed. Second, the service is superb. And then, in time of emergency, there’s none of this nonsense about women and children first.” The quote was probably not Churchill’s. But on the Costa Concordia, it wouldn’t be the women and children that would cause him delay, it would be the captain and his officers.
Written by PJ Rice at www.ricwquips.com