Tiger, Tiger, Pants on Fire

So what if Tiger Woods didn’t win a Major this year.  Hey, it hasn’t been that long since he announced to the world that he had an addiction.  I suspect he is still fighting his addiction. That is much more important than winning a Major.  He has been through treatment and therapy.  He announced his addiction in 2010 and this is only three years later.
I don’t know much about sexual addiction, but I guess Tiger was crazy about that stuff.  I know in the case of alcohol or drug addiction, the person forswears the evil product and refers to themselves as a recovering alcoholic or recovering drug addict.  Again, I don’t know what a sex addict does.  Is Tiger a recovering sex addict?
I tried to find a 12-step program for sex addicts, but I had no luck.  If they do have a 12-step program, I wondering which step is Lindsey Vonn?  She must be somewhat close to the end. Maybe Tiger has already been cured.  I can’t imagine his therapist is very happy about Lindsey. I’m afraid Tiger may be headed for recidivism.  And some people are worried about him not winning a Major.
Now,  I’m not big on conspiracy theories, especially when it comes to golf.  However, I have played round robin matches (you play six holes with each of the other three players in your foresome) where I concluded that the other three were conspiring to take my money.  It’s either that or I’m a bad golfer.  So I’ll go with the conspiracy theory.  Now, if I were one of Tiger’s devious opponents, I could position very attractive young ladies at strategic places in the gallery at Major events.  It’s possible that when Tiger sees the sweet young thing he may grab the wrong club!  I know you can’t make noise when a player is getting ready to hit the ball, but what if she is breathing heavily? 
I don’ think it would be appropriate for Tiger’s caddy to go over and ask the sweet young thing to stop breathing.  However, Casey Martin, who had a disabling injury, was permitted to use a golf cart.  The Supreme Court decided under the Americans with Disabilities Act that Casey could ride.  I’m wondering whether Tiger could qualify under the Americans with Disabilities Act to keep attractive women out of the gallery?
After all of the above, I’m about to say something profound.  Karma’s a bitch.
Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com

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