I retired from Arent Fox at the end of the year, so that I could devote more time to RICEQUIPS.COM. That was the plan.  You know what happens to plans.  They never quite work out as originally planned. That’s one of the things that I think makes Americans so special.  We adapt, adjust, modify, or shift gears without having to start over.

In the 1960’s, I was sent to the Defense Language Institute, West Coast (DLIWC) to study German.  That’s all I did for six months.  A lot of the students in my class were enlisted and even though I was a junior captain, I became class leader.  After about three months, the Chairman of the German Department, Hans Von Richter, called all the class leaders together (there were only four).  It appeared that a new building had been completed at DLIWC and no money had been made available for landscaping.  So, one of the professors, on his own dime, paid for all the landscaping.  The department chairs did not think he should bear the cost.  So, each department decided to come up with a money making project to help pay back the professor.

The German Department decided they would have a German picnic and charge each person a small amount.  Much of the food would be contributed by the faculty.  One professor was going to make her famous German potato salad.  A German friend of the department owned a winery and he was going to contribute all the wine for the picnic.  There was a lot of excitement and planning by the faculty who were all Germans.  The picnic was set for about a month out and we must have had eight to ten meetings to make sure everything would be perfect.  The attention to detail was maddening.

The day of the picnic came and we drove inland to the picnic grounds.  While it was cool on the coast in Monterey, it was in the high 90’s at the picnic.  Also, we had brought a lot more children than anyone had anticipated.  The result was that we ran out of soda in the first 45 minutes.  Director Von Richter and the German professors were running around saying, “How could we know it would be so hot and so many children?  Mein Gott!”  While the professors were ranting and raving, a senior NCO came up to me and said, “Sir, give me a couple of bucks.  We’re going to buy some more soda.”  Well, twenty minutes later, we had all the soda we could drink and the German professors were amazed and delighted.  They couldn’t get over how we solved the problem with good old GI ingenuity.  The NCO came up to me and quietly said, “that’s why they lost the war, big on planning and unable to react.”

Well, my retirement took a left turn.  I’m still retired, but the blogging isn’t as efficient as I hoped.  It is still catch-as-catch-can.  My wife, Carole, had arthritis in both knees and we planned on getting it taken care of after my retirement.  She had both knees operated on last Wednesday.  Operation on Wednesday, walking on Thursday, climbing steps Friday morning and home Friday afternoon.  Mein Gott!

It was no fun putting Carole in the car at the hospital, especially for her.  She had a prescription for pain killers and Carole took it out of the folder as we were driving to the military hospital at Fort Belvoir to fill the prescription.  Suddenly, she couldn’t find the prescription.  It is crazy how a little piece of paper can go hide, and hide it did.  We knew it had to be in the car, but we actually had to have Carole painfully climb out of the car in order to find it.  What an ordeal.  Then, after we found it, I wanted to negotiate to see how many of the pain killers I got.

Now, I am fully employed as a not-so-practical nurse (NSPN).  It came to me in a flash.  RN stands for “really nuts.”  I would have to be really nuts to do this any longer than absolutely necessary.

She is making incredible progress.  Back in 1987, I had my knee scoped.  They took out some small pieces of meniscus.  It was no big deal, but I had to sign a release saying it was OK if they broke my leg.  I asked them why they would break my leg if they were just scoping my knee.  They told me if I didn’t sign the release, they could not operate.  So I signed.  They could have said they wouldn’t break my leg (I knew they wouldn’t), but then again, they couldn’t say that.  It’s all quite confusing unless you have dealt with medical malpractice issues.

Well, no broken leg.  After the procedure, they bandaged and wrapped me up, gave me crutches and sent me home.  They told  me I could take the bandage off (and shower) in five days.  I couldn’t wait to get the bandage off so I would be able to bend my knee.  After five days, I took the bandage off and found out that it wasn’t the bandage.  The knee was stiff as a board.  This is Carole’s fifth day and she has been bending her knees since day two.  Modern medicine is wonderful, but it’s still no fun for NSPN Rice.

But, don’t give up on me as a blogger.  When I’m not preparing a meal or washing clothes, I’ll try to write something.  I know, I know, women do these things all the time.  I truly don’t know how they do it or why anyone would refer to them as the weaker sex.  I’m going to take a nap.