All posts by pajarice

Gun Control – What to Do – Woe is Me

Whenever something horrible happens, like the inexplicable senseless shootings in Aurora, Colorado, Congress postures, holds hearings and does nothing.  I decided I really needed to write on this subject, but then I realized that I am woefully ignorant of what laws are on the books.  Maybe I will figure some of them out before I finish this.  I do, however, have strong feelings about gun control.  I am satisfied that the NRA would consider me unamerican and the Brady gun control gang would think I am an idiot.

I spent 28 years in the Army and have never owned a gun.  I think guns are beautiful.  I just have no use for them in my house.  I have qualified with both pistols and rifles.  I’ve disassembled them, cleaned them, and reassembled them.  That’s part of being a soldier.  I guess the bottom line is that I have never lived in a place where I felt threatened.  If I lived in an area where the safety of my family was an issue, I would damn well betcha get a permit for a gun and purchase something that would put a big hole in an assailant.  I hope that never happens.

I strongly believe in keeping guns out of the hands of criminals.  Tacking a lot of years on to the sentence of a person who uses a gun in the commission of a crime should have some deterrent effect.

We also need to keep weapons out of the hands of crazy people.  But crazy people can, on occasion, act normal and that’s probably what they do when they are purchasing a fire arm.  I have no problem with background checks.  Who cares if it take three days or five days.  It serves a legitimate purpose.

I am not an outdoorsman, whatever that means.  But I respect their right to hunt, fish, drink beer and tell wild tales.  But, certain weapons are not for hunting.  I don’t think Bubba is going to take an AK-47 out to shoot squirrels.  We need to figure out a way to restrict military weapons.  I don’t believe the NRA will accept any restrictions.  Something about a slippery slope.  Well, that’s where I depart.  I would prohibit automatic weapons and military semi-automatic weapons.  I would also limit the number of rounds a magazine can hold.  You don’t need 100 rounds to shoot Bambi.

This is a great country.  When Mizzou plays Kansas and I am frothing at the mouth, I have to back away and remember we are all Americans.  I got sidetracked there, but what I want to say is the country is too diversified to have the same gun control laws in Wyoming and New York City.  I think states, and, in some cases, cities should set their own standards for gun control laws.  I doubt if Wyoming has many restrictions and I am sure that New York City has quite a few.  That makes sense.  If you don’t think it makes sense read no further.  I can’t help you.

I’m not a big gun control advocate, but I don’t believe the Government is staying up late at night trying to figure out how to take away our guns.  If I am wrong, then the Government will have to issue me one before they can take it away from me.

In 1978, Tom Daschel was elected for the first time to the House of Representatives.  He won a contested election by 139 votes in a recount.  He brought his family to DC and then rented a house next to ours in West Springfield.  We were neighbors for one year before I was reassigned to Fort Riley, Kansas.  I never discussed politics with Tom.  I did one snowy day push his car out of a snow bank.  I have often wondered if this would have been a better country if I had left him there.  I did, however, have a chat over the back fence with his wife, Laurie.  She was taking me step by step through the Democratic agenda.  All of a sudden it dawned on me that in South Dakota, Tom couldn’t have been in favor of gun control.  I asked Laurie what Tom’s position was on the right to bear arms.  She told me that Tom was in favor of the right to arm bears!  I gave up.

Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com

Carole’s Successful Bout with Pancreatic Cancer


When certain things happen in your life, your previous priorities go out the window.  In early June, we were to fly down to Fort Worth, Texas, for the annual reunion  of the Retired Army Judge Advocates.  We had been to 22 reunions in a row.  Canceled!  In the middle of June, we were heading back home to Carole’s high school reunion.  Canceled!  None of that seemed important.

On the 29th of May, 2012, Carole went in for a somewhat routing CAT scan of her lungs and GI tract.  We were subsequently notified that a small nodule was discovered on her pancreas.  A small nodule on her pancreas.  That’s an attention getter.  Carole’s younger brother, Bob, had died of pancreatic cancer.  We were now on a roller coaster racing up and down.  Two days later, Carole’s GI doctor, Dr. McBride, had set up an MRI for that day.  He then called us later that night to let us know that there was a small tumor and it needed to be addressed.

He told us that a Dr. John L. Cameron at Johns Hopkins Hospital was probably the best at the type of surgery that Carole would need.  He didn’t think he could get Dr. Cameron to handle Carole’s case, but if he could get Carole into the Johns Hopkins system, then Dr. Cameron would be in some oversight roll.  Dr. McBride told us he would call Dr. Cameron’s office the next day and see what he could do.

In the two days between the CAT scan and the MRI, I had been searching the internet on pancreatic cancer surgery.  Any number of times, I would end up on a Johns Hopkins website.  I knew of Dr. Cameron before Dr. McBride mentioned his name.  I also had heard of the Whipple Procedure operation.  They call it the Whipple Procedure after a doctor who improved the procedure and because no one could pronounce a pancreaticoduodenectomy!

Dr. McBride called us very excited the next morning (June 1).  Dr. Cameron had agreed to take Carole on as a patient.  We were equally excited.  The roller coster was climbing again.  That same day, we contacted Bonnie, Dr. Cameron’s administrative assistant and set up an appointment at Johns Hopkins with Dr. Cameron for Wednesday, June 6.  That date was our 53d wedding anniversary, but we were right where we needed to be.

On that Wednesday, we made our first trip to Johns Hopkins.  I plugged the address into my car navigation system and it took us on a very strange route to the Outpatient Clinic.  Then, after taking us on this circuitous route, it dropped us off two blocks North of our destination; an area where you would not want to have car trouble late at night.  I had previously studied maps of the area and got us to our destination.

Dr. Cameron was everything we hoped for and he explained to Carole that she had an Islet Cell tumor (pancreatic neuroendocrine tumor) near the head of the pancreas (on the Uncinate – Hey, look it up, I ain’t teaching no course here) and it needed to come out.  She needed a Whipple Procedure operation.  We were to call Bonnie and set up a date for the operation.  Dr. Cameron also said that if we wanted to go to the reunion we should go.  We had already decided not to go, but it pleased us that he believed that we could go to the reunion and still have time for a successful operation.

Carole and Bonnie set up the operation for Monday, June 18, within three weeks of when we found the tumor.  Carole had to get pulmonary and cardiology clearance for the operation.  Fortunately, she recently had a clearance from her Pulmonologist and her cardiologist had recently given her an EKG and an eco cardiogram.  The only remaining test she needed for the clearance was a stress test.  With the great help of her cardiologist, Dr. Stoebner, at DeWitt Hospital, Fort Belvoir, the nuclear stress test was set up for Tuesday, June 12.  This would give us a chance to send the results up to Johns Hopkins before the Friday, June 15 pre-operation meeting.

Early Tuesday morning, we went to DeWitt Hospital and Carole’s nuclear stress test went smoothly.  In the afternoon, however, we received a dreaded phone call that the result had shown something that might be blockage.  They would need to perform a heart cathorization to determine the extent of the blockage.  AND, if the blockage were over 50%, they would have to put a stent in.  AND, if they put in a stent, she couldn’t have surgery for 30 days!  The roller coaster was racing down hill and completely out of control.

So the next morning at 7:00 AM, we were back at DeWitt waiting for Carole’s next procedure.  The heart catherization showed no blockage!  All the doctors at DeWitt were exceedingly helpful.  We were back on track.

The Friday pre-operation meeting went smoothly.  We used that trip to Baltimore to set up housing for me for the while that Carole was in the hospital.  Johns Hopkins has a family residence called Hackerman-Patz located right across the street from the Weinberg Building where Carole would have her surgery.  In fact, the two buildings are connected by a sky walk.  The morning of the operation, I put Carole in a wheel chair and we used the sky walk to travel to the surgery reception center.

She had to be there at 5:00 AM.  The processing took about forty-five minutes and eventually they took Carole back for her preparation.  They brought me in a few minutes before they would wheel her into surgery.  I kissed her and told her that if she had bought me any golf clubs as a surprise birthday present, this was the time to tell me where she had hidden them.

Johns Hopkins has a policy of keeping the family of the patient informed as to the status of the operation.  I was informed that the operation began at 8:20.  Dr. Cameron had told us that the operation would take approximately five and a half hours.  Every two hours, someone would contact me and tell me that the operation was proceeding well.  That was appreciated.  After five hours, at 1:20 PM, Dr. Cameron found me and told me that Carole had done well and that I could see her at about 4:00.  It was closer to 5:00 and she looked like she had just lost a heavy weight fight.  Her eyes were puffy, plus, she had a ventilator coming out of her mouth and a drainage tube coming out of her nose.  I felt so sorry for her.  I came back later and the ventilator was gone.

The next morning, the nose drainage tube was gone.  This was progress at the most basic level.  She spent two days in the intensive care unit and during that time, they had her up and walking around the ward.  Dr. Cameron and his entourage visited Carole twice a day for the nine days she was hospitalized.  On Friday, June 22, Dr. Cameron mentioned on the way out, “Oh yes, your lab reports all came back negative and there will be no need for further treatment.”  No need for chemotherapy, no need for radiation, no need for nothing!  Now, all we had to do was survive the operation.  An operation where all kinds of things were removed (part of the pancreas, the duodenum, part of the intestines, the gallbladder, some lymph glands, some of the bile ducts and a portion of her stomach) and then what was left was resectioned back together.  Now do you understand nine days in the hospital?  Do you also understand why we were gleeful when we found out that Dr. Cameron, the best in the business, had agreed to operate on Carole?  Humpty Dumpty could have used Dr. Cameron.

We came home on Tuesday, June 26, and I became Dr. Mom.  It makes me appreciate women when I have to do the routine things they do every day.  I was and still am exhausted.  Carole came home with one drainage tube which I dutifully emptied three to four times a day, c
arefully recording the number of milliliter in the collection bulb and the color of the substance.  I came up with some new descriptive colors, like “strong tea” and “grapefruit juice.”

Every Friday, we trek up to Baltimore to get Carole checked out.  On Friday, July 6, they took Carole off of her pain medication.  That was easy for them.  They said no more Oxycodone and have a safe trip home.  The pain came back in spades.  I can’t believe how the codeine had masked Carole’s pain.  I believe it now.  Then, we had a little accident when the drainage tube fell out.  Oops!  It had pretty much run it course, but I felt pretty foolish calling up Bonnie and saying, “Oops.”

Last Friday, Dr. Devi, Dr Cameron’s assistant removed the last of the red, inch and a half long retention sutures.  For the last week, they had been doing more bad that good and we are now trying to recover the skin that was rubbed off.  So no bikini for Carole.  No great loss.  Her not wearing a bikini has long surpassed Cal Ripkin’s consecutive game record.  The problem is only a nuisance and not a threat.  And, because they felt sorry for the discomfort caused, they gave her a few more happy pills.

By the time I get this published, both of our daughters, Becky and Missy, will have visited and helped out.  Life is starting to return to normal.  Things that everyone takes for granted are starting to happen, like Carole rolling from her one side to the other in bed.  We feel like we still have a mile to go and we are doing it an inch at a time.  But, we are definitely moving, and what is known as a silent killer was discovered in time and removed.  Removing the tumor was a five star event.  Now, we are starting to focus on a Crystal Cruise of the British Isles in late August!

Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com

Books May Be a Window, But Some Are Painted Black


My first clue should have been that this 800-page book only cost a buck.  Wow, what a bargain.  It was about English history in the 1600’s and I thought that might be interesting.  The cover said it was a national best seller.  I should have asked myself which nation.  I guarantee it wasn’t on this side of the pond.

The book was entitled, “Cromwell, The Lord Protector.”  I knew during the 1600’s, the king had been overthrown and that England had been ruled without a monarch.  This book would give me the incite I wanted.

Let me say that I have a policy that once I start reading a book, I finish it.  And I’ve read some pretty deadly books.  Until this Cromwell book, I can only remember refusing to read to conclusion once.  It was a situation where I went to the window, opened it and screamed, “I’m as mad as hell and I’m not going to take it anymore.”  The book was Ludlum’s Borne Ultimatum.  I read Borne’s Identity and Supremacy.  But in Ultimatum, the master villain kept escaping all the way across Europe.  Then, somewhere in Poland or Russia, the good guys had him surrounded in a warehouse with no possibility of escape.  And for the 27th repetitious time, he escaped.  So, I went to the window.  Don’t tell me how it ends.  I may go to the movie.

I didn’t read books in high school and only that which was required in college.  In high school, being a good student, I was interviewed to compete for a book award.   Three teachers sat as an evaluation committee and inquired as to what books I had recently read.  I told them I hadn’t read any books because I was too busy and that outside reading wasn’t necessary.  When I reflect back on that meeting, I am amazed that I have gotten as far as I have in life.  Can you imagine me telling a book evaluation committee that reading books isn’t necessary?  Oh, I didn’t win the book award.  But my experience leads me to conclude that there might be hope for some of those idiotic seventeen year old’s out there.

The Cromwell book was published in 1973.  That’s close to 40 years ago, but, hey, Cromwell lived 400 years ago; so 40 years seemed to me contemporary.  I expected the book to have 17th century quotes that were difficult to read and understand.  Back then, no one said they had been “disrespected.”  But their idea of mischief was a whole lot worse than what we think of as mischief today.  Difficult quotes I expected, but the author’s style of writing put her back in the 1600’s and it was just too tedious.

I did learn that back in that period everything revolved around religion.  Their idea of a mixed marriage would be a Presbyterian marrying an Episcopalian.  Of course, the way marriages were arranged, such a dastardly thing couldn’t happen.  I am satisfied that more people have been killed to further religious ideals than any other reason.

So, after 300 tedious pages, I decided to go to Wikipedia and find out what became of Charles I.  They lopped his head off.  In that period, that was real mischief.  I feel that I am a better person for struggling through the 300 pages.  I am completely convinced that putting the book down was good for my emotional well being.  Let’s face it, I guess I am more of a Louis L’Amour guy.

Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com

The Day I Set Vietnam On Fire


I didn’t go to Vietnam until late in the war.  Oh, that’s right, it wasn’t a war, it was a conflict.  The military didn’t have jurisdiction over accompanying civilians because it wasn’t a war.  I’ll say this, it was a hell of a conflict.

I almost went to Vietnam in 1965.  I was assigned to III Corps and Fort Hood, Texas.  A secret message came down to Fort Hood directing that a corps headquarters be constituted and sent to Vietnam.  I had just stepped forward to go Regular Army so I figured I was a lock to go.  As it turned out, I was on orders to go to the Language School in Monterey, California.  That secret message directed Fort Hood not to take anybody who was on orders for a school.  So my JAG friends left without me.  The Corps SJA, Colonel Joe Sullivan, was part of the corps headquarters arriving in Vietnam.  As Colonel Sullivan got off the plane, he was advised that they had not requested a JAG full colonel.  That’s the Army we know and love.  After wandering around for 60 days without a job, Colonel Sullivan convinced the powers that be that he was a fifth wheel at the headquarters and was shipped back to Fort Hood.

I ended up going to the language school (studying German) and then having a three-year assignment in Germany; and, also, spending a year at Northwestern University before I was shipped to Vietnam.  I know it doesn’t sound like the Army we know and love to actually have someone study German and then be assigned to Germany.  The Army we know and love made up for it by sending me to Northwestern to get a Masters Degree in criminal law and then, never giving me another criminal law assignment.

I finally arrived in Vietnam in July 1970.  I spent my birthday at the 90th Replacement Battalion.  Their singular goal was to make life so miserable for new arrivals that they would jump at the chance to join their new units.  They were very good at their job.  They had a detachment that cut wood all night long using ban saws.  What seemed strange to me is that the saws were silent during the daytime.  By the end of three days, I was delighted to climb on a chopper and join the 1st Cav SJA Office at Phouc Vihn. 

I think Phuoc Vihn was about 40 to 50 miles north of Saigon.  We called our outer permitter the “Green Line.”  It was three and a half miles long.  Inside the wire was the provincial capitol, a large air field and the Cav headquarters.  Sometime prior to my arrival, Viet Cong snuck onto our base and did some damage.  We remedied this by leveling everything outside the wire for a quarter of a mile and erecting ball park lights all along the Green Line (pointing out).  No more sneak attacks.

The VC had no problem finding us and would fire a rocket or a few mortars or RPGs at us each night.  We eventually caught the sneaky group and took out our vengeance.   The JAG Office and our quarters (hooches) were not in danger.  We were located quite a distance from the air field, headquarters and provincial capitol.  In fact, we were located down close to the Green Line, surrounded by defoliated rubber trees.  Periodically, during a storm, a rubber tree would fall over.  But, they weren’t very big and no one was hurt.

About six or seven months into my tour, we were instructed to do a “Spring Cleaning” around our area.  Being the Deputy SJA, I was tagged to run the clean up.  I had about 12 captains and about 15 enlisted men.  But, the area we had covered about five acres.  Our office, the courtroom and our hooches were in pretty good shape, but we had a large wooded area that was a complete mess.  We had been instructed to clean out undergrowth.  In the wooded area, the undergrowth was everywhere.

Then it came to me.  We could burn the wooded area and be done in no time.  I walked around it to make sure the fire would not spread.  Between the roads and fields, we seemed to have natural boundaries to retain the fire.  I checked the wind to ensure it would burn in the direction we planned.  I was really proud of my idea.

We started three or four fires on one edge and the fire took off.  It burned much more rapidly than I thought.  The next thing I remember is it appeared the fire was totally out of control.  And the noise.  The roar of the fire was deafening.  I could see branches on fire flying higher and higher, taking on a life of their own.  I was scared to death.  I saw my military career slipping through my fingers.  I had been a prosecutor and a defense counsel in trials.  Now, I feared I would be an accused.  I would be charged with unmitigated stupidity!

After what seemed like hours, but was probably thirty minutes, things started to settle down.  The deafening roar was gone.  I began regular breathing again.  The self-generated crises had passed.  To this day, I have always wondered why no one outside of our JAG office reacted to the fire.  We didn’t see the fire marshal or an MP or a concerned operations guy.  No one.

By the evening, everything had returned to normal, whatever that means in Vietnam.  And, I guess I missed my 15 minutes of fame.

Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com

Thanks Bubba – You Da Man!


My golf game has improved.  It is not my imagination.  The numbers don’t lie.    And, I owe it all to Bubba.  That’s right, Bubba Watson is my hero.

First of all, there is something about the name Bubba.  Only in America.  The name conjures up images for all of us.  Years back, when I heard there was a golfer on the pro circuit named Bubba, I was amused.  I guess that tells you what type of image it conjured up for me.  I wondered if when he bent over to address the ball, his butt crack showed.  He had to be somehow related to John Daly.  After all, like Daly, he does have his own line of clothes (“Bubba Golf” -what else?). 

I couldn’t wait to see what Bubba looked like.  I couldn’t wait to see him play.  Then, I saw he was swinging from the wrong side.  But how can you not pull for a guy named Bubba.  It also turned out that he was a nice guy.  Bubba “Nice Guy” Watson.  And, can he hit the ball!  His longest drive on the PGA tour was 416 yards.  I can’t hit the ball that far after I have hit it twice.  Bubba is leading the pro circuit with a driving average over 305 yards.  He generates a ball speed of 194 miles per hour.  Bubba is faster that a speeding bullet and more powerful than a locomotive.  That’s right, Bubba is Superman!

And, he didn’t just win the Masters; it was the way he won it.  Bubba is a magician with his clubs.  He probably has a boomerang shot where the ball comes back to him.  This saves on retrieving practice balls.  Anyway, as many of you know, he executed one of his impossible shots to win the Masters.  Deep in the woods on the second playoff hole, from 164 yards away, he put 40 yards of hook on his 52 degree gap wedge shot to put the ball on to the green.  The rest was history.

So, how has Bubba helped my game.  He hits left handed, I hit right.  He drives over 300 yards.  I’m happy when I get it out there 175 yards.  He’s 6′ 3″, I’m 5′ 7″.  I had been serving as a Army JAG officer for 16 years before Bubba was born.  But, when I am going through my pre-shot routine, the last thing I say to myself is, “What would Bubba do with this shot?”  That thought is so ridiculous that it causes me to smile and relax.  When I smile and relax, the tension disappears.  Without the tension the swing is smoother and just better.  The ball has a greater chance of going where I intended it to go (and it also goes farther). 

Thanks Bubba.

Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com

Frank, Frank Who?


Coach Frank Haith of the University of Missouri was selected by the Associated Press as the 2011-12 college basketball Coach of the Year.  Even though I thought he deserved it, I was totally surprised.  Why?  Because he wasn’t even selected as the Big 12 Coach of the Year.

I don’t know who selected the Big 12 Coach of the Year, but whoever it was, they had a tie between Coach Self from KU and Coach Hoiberg from Iowa State.  I suspect Coach Haith ranked fairly high among those schools who were leaving the Big 12 to join other conferences.  Would I accuse the Big 12 of considering that fact in making their decision?  If I denied it, it would sound as hokey as the selection of Hoiberg and Self.  So you can certainly see why I was surprised that some coach who wasn’t good enough to be the Big 12 Coach of the Year would be the AP Coach of the Year for the entire nation.

Now, I’m not happy that MIZZOU is leaving the Big 12.  After Nebraska left, I thought we had a pretty decent bunch of schools.  But, it is all about money and I, quite frankly, am clueless.  I have heard that Texas and Oklahoma were getting the lion share of the TV revenue and that is why Nebraska, Colorado and now, Texas A&M and MIZZOU have departed.  If someone knows the truth of the matter, I would love to hear from them.

I wasn’t real excited when Frank Haith was selected to be the basketball coach.  He came from Miami where in seven years he had a record of 43 & 69 in conference play.  Miami was being looked at by the NCAA.  I think Miami (“The U”) is always being looked at for NCAA violations.  I think the NCAA has a desk devoted to the University of Miami (“The U Desk”).  Anyway, who was this Frank and how would he fit in?  Well, with only seven scholarship players and only one starter over 6’6″, the team went 30 and 5 and was ranked third in the nation at the end of the regular season.

I think we’ll keep Frank.

Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com

Bracketoology – Is It an Art or a Science?


March Madness!  You bet.  What a great time for college basketball.  And each year, the TV coverage gets better.  This year, every game was on TV.  Even in earlier years when the games were only on CBS, they made sure they would switch over and catch the exciting ending of every game.  My son, Paul, even schedules his vacation days so he catches every minute of the fantastic first week.  So what went wrong for me?  I hope you have a few minutes.

First, I generally don’t get into a pool.  I hate losing.  About the only exciting thing for me is filling out the brackets.  After that, everything goes down hill.  My main frustration is that I am terribly conflicted.  It is my general rule that if I don’t have a dog in the fight, I pull for the underdog (My dog/dog rule).  However, when I filled out my brackets, I usually picked the favorite to win.  So there I am cheering against myself.  This has nothing to do with the glass being half empty.  It’s a zero sum game and if I win, I lose.

But this year, a friend of mine was running a sophisticated pool and I did have a dog in the fight.  So I went against my better judgement and jumped into the pool.  Splash.  I even recorded a couple hours of ESPN bracketing.  I’ll never do that again.  I got more out of the commercials.  Would it surprise you that Digger Phelps likes Notre Dame’s chances?  Dick Vitale liked everybody, baby.  Geez.

VCU was one of my underdog favorites.  I liked their coach and they did well last year.  But, in doing my “research,” I discovered that a lot of “experts” liked Wichita State to go deep.  Wichita State was a five seed and VCU was a 12.  I had never seen Wichita State play, but all the buzz got me excited.  So I scratched out VCU (who, of course, won) and went with Wichita State to not only beat VCU, but also Indiana.  If I picked stock the same way I picked my brackets, I’d be broke.  In fact, during the dot.com era, that’s how I did pick my stocks and I lost my shirt.  Some of the stocks I invested in can now only be found in time capsules.

Of course, my alma mater, MIZZOU, was a two seed and picked to go far in the tournament.  I have previously written about what a great team they are and what fun the are to watch (see Fun Ball – MIZZOU B-ball).  They lost in the first round to Norfolk State.  State could do no wrong and we just couldn’t find that spark.  That was my personal disaster and dropped a shroud over the entire tournament.  I looked at Kansas and said to myself, “We beat them.”  I looked at Baylor playing in the Elite Eight and said, “We beat them THREE times.”  It would have been so much fun to see how MIZZOU would have done against a Michigan State or a Louisville.  But it was not to be.  It is easier to say, “Get over it,” than to do it.

My friend, Chet, who is running the bracket pool is so prolific.  He sends out a report after every day’s play.  Charts, lists, diagrams, he does it all.  And so almost every day, I am reminded that I didn’t know and don’t know what I am doing.  Enough!

President Obama picked MIZZOU to be in the final four.  Maybe that is what jinxed it.  Having that guy on your side has got to be trouble.  But with all the help he got, I suspect he did better than I did.  In fact, I did so poorly in my predictions that a number of high level Republicans have approached me and requested that I predict that Obama will be re-elected.

Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com

The Judge Says – Military Jurisdiction and Child Abuse


February 16, 1981

There comes a time in every soldier’s assignment where he can no longer say, “I’m sorry, I don’t know.  I haven’t been here very long.”  I usually try to use that excuse for the better part of a year.  But, as to this assignment, the excuse is long gone.

Shortly after I arrived here, certain concerned parents brought a very serious problem to my attention.  The problem was child abuse and the inability on Fort Riley to remove a battered child from the home.  It was believed that the state courts had no jurisdiction to act concerning matters on the post.  We could remove the family from the post and then let the state wait for another incident, but that was not acceptable.  The concerned parents explained to me that they expected my support, or they would have to assume that I beat my children.  Their argument was not logical, but extremely persuasive.  Seriously, it took some period of time before they could convince me that we even had a chance.

Eventually, we were all convinced we had a fighting chance of changing 30 years of Kansas law.  We solicited the help of Steve Opat, Geary County Attorney and his assistant, David Platt (they are the ones who would be carrying the workload burden).  Our sessions with them were fruitful.  We then jointly posed the question to the Attorney General of Kansas, Robert T. Stephan.

In an opinion dated January 16, 1981, Mr. Stephan gave us exactly what we wanted.  He concluded that when the Federal Government ignores an area of law (such as child abuse), then the state district court may “hear and adjudicate proceedings pursuant to the juvenile code, with respect to neglected, wayward or abused children, concerning incidents occurring on the Fort Riley Military Reservation.”

This little victory doesn’t solve the problem.  However, it does give us one more tool to use in combating child abuse.

Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com

Obooma and Gas Prices


Obooma says on gas prices, nothing can be done,
It’s trouble in the Middle East, it’s the position of the sun.
Maybe global warning, but that would be strange,
That’s a tough thing to accept, so we’ll call it climate change.
Gas prices just keep climbing, the situation seems quite grim,
But the environmentalists and Obooma, treat it like a hymn.

Obooma says on gas prices, nothing can be done,
What was the Keystone pipeline, just politics to be spun?
Obooma blames the Republicans for not giving him time,
Like waiting till after November, so he can hide his crime.
What about the Arctic Refuge, with a zilllion barrels of oil?
Can’t our American know-how keep the Refuge free from spoil?

Obooma says on gas prices, he’s working really hard,
When votes are at risk, he becomes quite the bard.
With sky-rocketing prices and fewer cars on the road,
It reduces our carbon footprint and helps the endangered toad.
    (This will help the toad get across the road).

Obooma said three years into his term, things would be OK,
Well it’s time for him to pack it up and move without delay.
He’s truly Nero fiddling, while our country goes to hell,
But his voice is quite appealing and he bows exceedingly well.
Parties at the White House give him chances to get down,
But for the good of our nation, we need to get rid of this clown.

Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com

Fun Ball – MIZZOU B-Ball


What a fun season.  Fun, fun, fun.  Watching the Missouri Tigers play basketball is really fun.  The word “fun” when used with competitive sports usually sets me off.  When I hear a coach say, “I just want my boys to go out and have fun.”  I say, “Oh yeh?”  Fun is a code word for winning.

Think this through.  Is it fun to lose?  Is it fun to win?  Be honest now.  Well, there was the one coed volleyball game we lost in junior high.  Nah, it sucked.  If it is truly a competitive sport, how can anyone have fun while they are losing?  I’ll just mention in passing that during the three years I was in high school, we never lost a football game.  Old East Side High.  Fun.

So if MIZZOU is fun to watch, they must be winning.  But it is so much more.  It is all the things they do in the process of winning.  First, in the era where seven footers are bumping into each other on the court, MIZZOU’s starting line up is short.  They play a four guard offense.  The four guards range from 6′ 6″ to 5′ 10″.  Ricardo Ratliffe is the only decent size player on the floor.  He is 6′ 8″ and is leading the entire nation in field goal percentage.  Sure, a lot of his baskets are from around the bucket, but all these seven footers are also scoring under the bucket.  As soon as his hands touch the ball, it is in the basket.  No bouncing the ball, no faking one way and then the other, just fast as a magic trick.  Ratliffe was a two-year JUCO first team All American before he moved to Columbia.

Next, in an era when college basketball teams are permitted to have 13 players on scholorship, MIZZOU has seven.  Laurence Bowers would have been number eight, but he tore his ACL before the season started.  Well, I guess he is still #8, he just can’t play.  So in the course of the battle only two subs come off of the bench.  Coach Frank Haith, in his first year at MIZZOU, has done a great job of shuffling players so as to keep them fresh.

So they are small and there aren’t many of them, and right now, they are 23 and 2 and ranked 3rd in the nation!  Talk about fun!  On the one hand, they would have made great boy scouts because they are constantly helping others.  Exceedingly unselfish.  Then, on the other hand, they are a group of artful dodgers pilfering the ball with great skill AND turning in fast break points.

Michael Dixon started last year and has been relegated to “sixth man” this year.  He could have bitched and moaned, but he has just accepted the roll and has played a key part in some of MIZZOU’s victories.  He has Bobby Knight’s vote for the NCAA’s sixth man.  I didn’t know there was such a thing.  I wonder if there is a 7th man or an 8th man.  Did I mention the Dixon and Marcus Denman shoot over 90% from the free throw line?  Couple all that with the fact that we have five players who can hit a clutch 3-pointer (they average 8 per game and make close to 4 out of every 10) and you are beginning to see how much fun it can be to watch them.

Flip Pressey, our point guard, is leading the Big 12 in steals and second in assists. They are just an unselfish bunch.  Kim English opted for the NBA draft two years ago and wasn’t picked up.  Last year, he was nothing special, but this year the senior has won games with every aspect of his skills.

What lies ahead?  Well, teams lose and I expect MIZZOU will get upset somewhere down the line.  That won’t be fun.  They have to play Kansas in Kansas in a couple of weeks.  Then there’s the Big 12 Championship and the NCAA finals.  Regardless of what happens, it’s been fun.  MIZ-

Written by PJ Rice at www.ricequips.com