You probably don’t realize it, but I have self appointed myself as your consumer advisor.  I will look at products that have fortunately fallen into my hands and will report on them.  Everybody would like to make a contribution to our society and this is mine.

The product I am evaluating today is Gillette Fusion ProSeries Thermal Face Scrub.  I never buy that kind of stuff, so you can be sure that it came as a free sample when I bought the razor or some blades or something.  I know it’s a sample because it is such a tiny tube.  It’s so tiny that you can’t read the directions on the tube.  But who needs directions, especially when the name of the stuff is six words long.  It’s a face scrub and it deals with shaving and thermal means hot.

So I squirted a little on my hands.  Part of it was solid and part of it was liquid (not good).  I rubbed my hands together and it started getting hot.  Strange (I wonder if a boy scout could start a fire with this stuff).  Then I rubbed it on my face.  Face felt warm.  Good sign.  I wasn’t sure whether it was supposed to take the place of the shaving soap.  I tried to shave.  Not a good plan.  I got out a magnifying glass and the directions said to rinse it off.  Then shave as normal.

OK, I rinsed it off.  Then I applied my shaving soap.  The thermal scrub must have still been there, because as I was applying my shaving soap, something was killing my foam!  I applied twice as much shaving soap and had one-tenth of the foam.  I found out you can get by with one-tenth of the foam, but it still seemed crazy.

Then I decided that maybe my problem was that I wasn’t using a Gillette shaving soap.  I was using Medicated Noxema for sensitive skin in a red can.  The can said, “THICK RICH LATHER.”  They had never seen what a thermal face scrub could do to their thick rich lather.

I finally decided that maybe this was some ingenious plan by Gillette to ensure the use of Gillette shaving gel.  I am the proud owner of one can of Gillette Fusion Hydra Gel moisturizing shaving cream with Aloe and Cocoa Butter.  I don’t care for the gel, but the can was only $1.80 at the Commissary and Carole had a $2.00 coupon (We’ll never get rich, but what the hell).

So in my ever-vigilant quest for knowledge, I applied the Gillette gel after applying the thermal face scrub.  I am here to report that there are no devious chemists at Gillette.  Gillette’s shaving gel failed to make foam when confronted with the face scrub.

I decided to go on Google and Youtube to see if I was overlooking something by not reading the directions.  I seemed to be using the product correctly.  I watched a couple of guys on Youtube and they applied the thermal face scrub just like I did.  Of course, I didn’t see anyone apply shaving cream after the fact.  So, I am giving the product a C- because it is a foam killer.

One of the things that frosts me is when a product I am using disappears or changes its appearance so that I can’t find it.  I use a Head and Shoulders shampoo.  I think Head and Shoulders must have 40 different shampoos.  Different names, different color containers.  Sometime back, my particular shampoo went to purple writing on a white container.  That was neat.  All I had to do was scan through the H & S section until I found purple.  I wonder if they have thought about their customers who are color blind.

The last time I looked, purple had disappeared.  So I looked for the magic words.  My magic H & S words are “extra volume.”  I looked at all the bottles for the magic words.  No luck.  Fortunately, I have one more bottle stashed away, so we are not in crises mode yet.  But, I do need that extra volume!

I’ve used Old Spice stick deodorant forever.  It too has gone through a number of iterations.  I think I was around when stick deodorant first came on the market.  I was a little kid and my eccentric Aunt Marie showed up at our house with a stick deodorant.  She had me and my brother unbutton our shirts and she rubbed the stick deodorant on our chests.  I thought it stunk.  I was eight years old and I decided that Aunt Marie wasn’t eccentric, she was crazy.  She drove around in a big new Cadillac and her license plate was attached with chicken wire.  She also was convinced that fluoride in the drinking water was a Communist plot.  I thought it was stick deodorant.

Anyway, the last time I looked for my Old Spice High Endurance deodorant, they had changed the label.  But, when I found what I thought was the right one, it said at the top of the container (I’m serious), “High Endurance.  SAME STUFF! DIFFERENT LABEL.”  Now there’s a company after my heart.

Written by PJ Rice on www.ricequips.com